Sort it out

You ever read simple words that just hang in your face the rest of the day?  That passage or sentence that permeates your breathing air?  I’m not talking about those inspirational words framed under a picture of an eagle soaring above the Grand Canyon or anything that is intended to move/inspire/haunt you.  I mean that random line of graffiti you saw on the bus ride home, that one line of text buried in a 90,000 word novel, the words scrawled in crayon under the drawing held onto the door of your fridge by the fruit magnets.

I read something today that made me realize; it’s all over, there’s no more reason to get upset, no more reason to be frustrated, these words solve EVERYTHING!

I should have known it was going to be good just based on the author’s names.  Two of my favorite fantasy/sci-fi writers, Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett.  The book “Good Omens” is (in short) about Armageddon and an angel and demon tasked with overseeing the birth and rearing of the Anti-Christ.  Situations arise, sub-plots ensue but right near the end, the Anti-Christ child has all the power and he’s reasoning for himself.  He’s arguing with Beelzebub and The Metatron about not wanting to start Armageddon.  They argue that we have to destroy the world to save the world and his counter is, “If you stopped telling people it’s all sorted out after they’re dead, they might try sorting it all out while they’re alive.”

I put the book down, I sat there for forty five minutes staring at the ceiling (and then I fell asleep and had a good nap…)

I have been trying to find those words for years.  Ever since I gave up on the whole “religion” thing, I have continually been frustrated and bewildered by those around me that still play the God game.  It’s one of those things like The Matrix.  It can’t be explained, you have to see it for yourself.  Once you’re out of the system, you can’t go back in…  So I’m not frustrated at the people that are still involved in a primitive idea like God, I’m frustrated at myself for not being able to come up with the right words to explain why I’m no longer under that spell.

I can’t explain it, it just doesn’t make sense to me anymore.  Whenever someone asks me, it always becomes a thirty minute conversation.  I use all the wrong words and give the wrong impressions…  And I can never come up with a short and succinct explanation for why I think religion (Judeo-Christian religions in particular) is a bad thing.  Well now I’ve found it.  It takes all my long, drawn out arguments (scapegoatism, false affliction-false remedy,  etc…) and condenses them into a simple phrase.

If people weren’t conned into believing in an afterlife paradise, they just might try to make the most out of the life they have.  If they weren’t lied to and told that all their offenses are already excused, they just might treat people better.  If they weren’t guilted into believing they are born as damaged goods, they just might feel better about themselves…

“If you stopped telling people it’s all sorted out after they’re dead, they might try sorting it all out while they’re alive.

I’m putting those words into my little book of “the coolest shit I’ve ever heard”.