I forgot to top off my gas tank yesterday. I didn’t remember it until well after midnight. Damn. I don’t really need gas, I’m at three-quarters of a tank but I didn’t want to join in with these morons that think that not buying gas on one day will make a difference. I’ve gotten six e-mails telling me to boycott the gas stations on May 15th. This is a stupid idea. It’s like a bunch of children in a classroom all deciding to drop their book on the floor at the same time. The gas/oil companies know we will either fill up the day before or the day after. If you REALLY want to affect the price of gasoline, buy a smaller car. Walk to the store instead of driving. Buy a hybrid. Convert your diesel to a bio-diesel. That big fat SUV in your driveway is going to need a lot of gas, whether you buy it today, or tomorrow. Skipping a day shouldn’t even register in the oil companies system. Simple people doing silly things to comfort their conscious and assuage their guilt. Mr. and Mrs. Smith may join you in your little boycott and they’ll sleep better that night thinking to themselves that they’ve made a difference, but in the morning they are still waking up and driving the kids to school in the Hummer (stopping at Starbucks on the way of course…) If you can get people to refrain from buying gasoline for a whole month, that would make a difference. Get them to do it for a week and maybe it would register. But no, that would be too much of an inconvenience to their lives. People will join any cause, as long as it makes them feel better but more importantly, it has to be easy. If they are inconvenienced at all, it’s too difficult and they’d rather sit and watch their reality shows on television. People suck! I know, I am a people.
Once again I sit here at work, and I wait. I did a lot of prep work to make sure that nothing goes wrong but I didn’t count on the normal bullshit. I came in this morning and drove on to the base, checked my code in the gate, put my hands on the wires I needed to test tonight, met the tech I’d be working with… Everything to make sure that it went smooth tonight. I got here 30 minutes early tonight and call in only to find out that somehow, the time got changed from 0400z to 0500z. So now I sit here for another hour. I just can’t win.
While I’m sitting here, the night crew is watching Jay Leno. He has a little game show segment where he supposedly takes normal people off the streets and asks them normal questions. They can’t possibly be normal people. I HOPE this isn’t unscripted like he says it is. I swear, I’m not making this up, these are the real questions and answers:
Q: In 1939, Germany invaded Poland starting what war?
A: The Cold War?
Jay: It was a big worldwide war.
A: WW1?
Q: Who were the Rough Riders?
A: A group of rappers headed up by DMX?
Q: What city was buried by the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius?
A: Was it in the United States?
Jay: No, it started with Pomp…
A: Pomp Island?
Q: They show a picture of the Parthenon. What is this?
A: The Berlin Wall?
Q: A picture of Washington crossing the Delaware. Who is this?
A: It looks like they are getting ready for a battle… General Lee?
Q: A picture of the Santa Maria. What is the name of this boat?
A: The Red Cross?
Jay: It was one of Columbus’ ships.
A: The Mayflower?
Jay: It was the largest of the three. He had three of them…
A: He did? Oh yeah, he discovered America in 1952.
Q: Finish this statement: Don’t throw the baby…
A: Away?
Jay: Don’t throw the baby away with the…
A: Garbage?
Q: In which country is Farsi spoken?
A: Farson?
Jay: (Laughing) Close…
A: Canada?
Jay: If I ran over to you to ask you… If I RAN, over there…
A: Ranover?
The Rough Riders question is the only one that anyone even came close to getting right away. While no one had any idea who Theodore Roosevelt was and even less of an idea there was a Spanish-American war, the “Ruff Ryders” is actually a rap gang. I know he said it was real people and completely unscripted but it couldn’t be. If it is, I am very, very scared. All three of these people were fucking stupid and they were supposed to be a cross section of the average American? I’m not that dumb and neither are you.
What’s worse is I’m half listening to the Conan O’Brian show now and the commercial says, “Next on Carson…” I look up and there’s some dink behind a desk doing late night and using the name Carson. I don’t care who he is or if it’s his real name or not. There was only one late night Carson and that was Johnny. Fuck Carson Daily, he should be forced at gun point to change his name before he is given a late night show. If someone wanted to run for Chancellor of Germany and his name just happened to be Bob Hitler, he’d have to change his name. If you want a late night show and your name just happens to be Ralph Letterman, you’ve got to change it. Sorry, my world, my rules…
After all this prep work for my maintenance window, the system eats my lunch again. The PNOCC didn’t coordinate properly and when AT&T called in, they completed the work without me. So now, the ticket is closed, the circuits are released back to the FAA and I can’t touch them. I’m going back to the hotel and unless something interesting happens tomorrow, this entire week will have been for naught!
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