I’m a little conflicted this morning. I encountered a paradox last night that I have yet to solve.
Any one who knows me will swear that they based Eric Cartman from South Park straight off of me. Every time a new episode airs, one of my friends will say, “Dude, that is SO like you!”. That is not always a good thing. Cartman represents all the “evil little bastard” that is still in me.
Last night, on the new episode, Cartman wanted to eradicate all the “drum circle hippies”. He says the only thing that will rid South Park of the hippie infestation is the band “Slayer”. He plays “Raining Blood” (my second favorite song by my all-time favorite band) and all the hippies leave.
I am a drum circle hippie (in training) but I love Slayer.
Will my love of the drum circle make me turn against Slayer?
Is my love of Slayer preventing me from fully enjoying drum circle?
Am I Cartman?
Is Cartman me?
If a train left Chicago at 8:42am traveling at a constant speed of…
AHHH! I just can’t handle all these questions!
I have a very definite “Cartman” side to me. (EVERYONE does, I just show mine a little more than most.) I keep trying to fight against the Cartman but it’s those traits that define me to those around me. If I succeed in becoming a more tolerant person, effectively killing the Cartman inside me, than who am I? I won’t be the same person I am now. Am I ready to evolve?
If I asked my friends and family if they wanted me to change, I’m sure the answer would be a resounding, “YES!”. But are they sure? Will they still love me if I’m not the cut-up I am now? Will they even know who I am? Sure, I take things too far. I’ve done many horrible things. But they define me as me and for the most part, I like me. Most of the more heinous traits have already been eliminated. There are more things I’d like to change but I can’t lose ALL of the negativity or I’ll lose my identity.
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