Tarantino’s half of the “Grindhouse” flick. I liked the concept. The idea of releasing a 70′s style double feature right along with the crackle in the soundtrack and the flicker in the screen… I thought it would be cool. Unfortunately he either went too far with it or he didn’t go far enough. The movie took place in modern day America. Cell phones and all that. But the movie dragged out like a slow 70′s drama. If he had replicated the 70′s movie I would have endured it but it just went on too long. Mindless exposition that never has any payoff. I wanted to go to sleep. But, there were a couple of good scenes and I suffered through it to the end.
Four girls drive through the city. They chatter on and on about mindless things. It is obvious that Tarantino is trying to replicate the success of “Pulp Fiction’s” mindless dialog but here he fails miserably. It is warmed over prattle that I had absolutely zero interest in. The girls arrive at a bar for a night of partying before a girls-only weekend at the lake house. In the course of the night we meet another bar patron who is on bad terms with our gaggle of giggling tits and script fodder. They all meet up with Stuntman Mike (played by Kurt Russell) who is just passing through. We see that Stuntman Mike is an amicable cowboy type who is a really nice guy. He offers to give the outsider girl a ride home. As she gets into his souped up Chevy Nova she is surprised to see that the passenger seat is missing and encased in Plexiglas. Stuntman mike educates her on what the stuntman industry calls a “death proof car”. He can crash into anything in this baby and live. She is relieved until she also notices that there is no way to open the door and she is locked in. Stuntman Mike then tells her that she is in the wrong seat for the car to be death proof. He goes on a maniacal ride smashing her from side to side and back to front. She appears to be close to death and Stuntman Mike drives head on into the oncoming carload of the other girls. Everyone dies, excluding Stuntman Mike who was, in the death proof seat.
A year goes by and in another town Stuntman Mike surfaces again in his new death proof car. Four more girls are sitting around talking again. It didn’t work earlier and it doesn’t work this time either. So they go out into the country to test drive a classic car. They leave the baby of the group behind and go for a joy ride. The daring one gets out onto the hood and holds in place by two belts tied through the open windows of the doors. They are having fun until Stuntman Mike shows up and tries to run them off the road. There is a nice fifteen minute chase sequence where they are running from and then chasing Stuntman Mike. Most of it with the girl still on the hood. There were THOUSANDS of moments where they could have hit the brakes and stopped long enough to get the third girl into the car. But I guess it wouldn’t have given us anything to watch. Eventually they turn the tables on Stuntman Mike and beat the crap out of him. The end.
This was a waste of film. It was a self-indulgent wet dream and served no purpose other than to showcase Tarantino’s love of classic cars, 70′s films and off-topic conversations. I watched this with Freddy and I promised him I wouldn’t tear it apart until I saw the whole thing. No repeat of “The Crow”. Well, in my honest opinion, I see no reason for this movie to exist and if I never see it again I’ll only be too happy. The only good thing I have to say about it is that it did make reference to several old “gear head” movies and I just added them to my Netflix queue. I’m hoping they don’t bear any resemblance to this piece of shit they inspired.
2 of 11 Skulls
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