I’m home, the house is decorated (she added more lights while I was gone!!!) and I’m listening to some Christmas music.
But of course I can’t relax, I have to be upset about something! Lyrics. We sing these same songs every damn year and no one thinks about what they’re singing.
“Do You Hear What I Hear?”
“…A child shivers in the cold, we shall bring him silver and gold…” Wouldn’t a blanket be a better gift if he’s shivering and cold? It took Becca to point that one out to me a couple of years ago.
“The Little Drummer Boy”
“…The ox and lamb kept time, pa rum pa pum pum….” He’s not much of a little drummer boy if the ox and lamb have to do his job for him. I mean, he only has one job, play the drum! Why does he have to have help? And really, is a marching snare drummer such a great gift for a sleeping infant? Why not get him a bassinet? Maybe a nice warm blanket (see above)…
Oh Chris, you of all people should know that a drumbeat can be a soft, pleasant thing to sleep by. NO!! In every portrayal I’ve seen of this phantom drummer boy, he’s got a shallow drum strapped to him and he’s playing it with sticks. Pa rum pa pa pum is a drag-paradiddle! He’s not playing some soft heartbeat on a Mediterranean drum, he’s beating that thing like he’s auditioning for DCI!
But Chris, those are western images and created by people of modern centuries. You can’t make arguments based on such obvious false images. Oh YES I CAN! As long as I see paintings of a long haired white Jesus I can! If we let go of our images and went with what’s most likely to be true, you’d all lose your mind because Jesus looked more like Osama Bin Laden than Barry Gibb.
So the Little drummer boy was a shitty drummer who had an ox/lamb click-track going on behind him and he woke up the baby!
Merry Christmas and Pa rum pa pa pum motherfuckers!
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