All come forth and pay heed to the latest decree from your
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Emperor!
All news rooms will be outfitted with high voltage wires to the news anchor’s chairs. Remote reporters will be outfitted with a wire strapped to their leg. The supply voltage will electrocute them (live and in front of the camera) every time they utter something stupid. First offense is a three second warning jolt, second offense doubles to six, third goes to twelve and so on…
Tonight’s example:
“The polls showed the numbers in January of 2009 were 70% against and 30% for. Now, three months later, those numbers have doubled.”
Under my administration, she gets lit up like a Christmas tree and we all have a short laugh as she composes herself and reads the rest of the news with a little more caution.
That is all.
April 30th, 2009 at 8:29 pm
you will destroy the already beleaguered news advertising revenue streams if you make them report news correctly.